shoplifter

[chuck]

..........so this older lady is at the grocery store, shopping with her husband.

....she ends up getting caught for shoplifting.

......she goes to court, accompanied by her husband.

..........the judge says, 'says you stole a can of peaches?'

....yes, your honor, says the lady.

......'how many peaches were in that can?' says the judge.

........'six peaches, your honor,' says the lady.

......'ok, that will be six days in jail, one day for each peach!'

...............quietly, in the back the husband speaks......, " she also stole a bag of frozen pea's too your honor!!!"

[chuck]

....so the old man and lady are driving down the hwy, and get pulled over by a cop.
...cop says, 'you know you were going 120km!'
.....the old man replies,'really, i swear i was going 90km.'
.....his wife speaks up, " now honey, you KNOW you were going 130km !!"
..."&%%&.....quite woman!, exclaims the old man.
......then the cop says." i see you got a broken tail light. i will have to write you up on that too!"
...old guy says, ' really, i didn't know that was broken!!"
.......wife speaks up again, " now honey, you KNOW that tail light has been broken for 2 weeks now!!"
....old man replies, " $#*#^ quite woman!
....the cop then says to the old lady," does your husband always talk to you like that?"
........"only when he's drinking!", says the woman.

pay back for the peas!! loll