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chicot60
04-03-2011, 10:24 PM
Golf Poem

In My Hand I Hold A Ball,
White And Dimpled, Rather Small.

Oh, How Bland It Does Appear,
This Harmless Looking Little Sphere.

By Its Size I Could Not Guess,
The Awesome Strength It Does Possess.

But Since I Fell Beneath Its Spell,
I've Wandered Through The Fires Of Hell.

My Life Has Not Been Quite The Same,
Since I Chose To Play This Stupid Game.

It Rules My Mind For Hours On End,
A Fortune It Has Made Me Spend.

It Has Made Me Yell, Curse And Cry.
I Hate Myself And Want To Die.

It Promises A Thing Called Par,
If I Can Hit It straight And Far..

To Master Such A Tiny Ball,
Should Not Be Very Hard At All..

But My Desires The Ball Refuses,
And Does Exactly As It Chooses.

Often It Will Have A Whim,
To Hit A Tree Or Take A Swim.

With Miles Of Grass On Which To Land,
Then Has Me Offering Up My Soul,
If Only It Would Find The Hole.

It's Made Me Whimper Like A Pup,
And Swear That I Will Give It Up..
And Take To Drink To Ease My Sorrow,
But The Ball Knows ...... I'll Be Back Tomorrow.
.......
A recent study found the average golfer walks about 900 miles a year. Another study found golfers drink, on average, 22 gallons of alcohol a Year. That means, on average, golfers get about 41 miles to the gallon. Kinda makes you proud.Almost feel like a hybrid... =